alldelighted

my sherona

Mon, 16 Jun 2008 21:17:56 GMT

i keep having dreams with a certain person that i was obsessed with for pretty much the entirety of my high school years. and then i end up being bitter at my naivete for the rest of the day. not bitter because of him, bitter because i was stupid. and its embarassing.

i also had a dream that i was trapped in a corner and a snake was coming after me. somebody grabbed the snake but it was too late, and it bit my neck. i woke up terrified, clutching my neck with both hands.

point is, i shouldnt dream. or i should get a fluffier pillow...

summertime, and the livin's easy

Sun, 15 Jun 2008 01:49:05 GMT

small insignificant updates
- im basically the winner of summer school. i got the highest grade on my bio exam, and 100% on my math exam.
- im going to minor in sociology.
- i started at urban again last week, it was more awesome than i remembered.
- my office job is going ok, too. for some reason stuffing folders or making labels for 8 hours straight makes time go really fast.
- i discovered that vanilla italian soda with cream and whipped cream is the best thing since... vitamin b vitamin water.
- everytime i try to cut my bangs they end up being disastrous. i don't know why i keep doing it.
- i got an apartment today! its a little old looking but im looking forward to fixing it up.
- matt is probably visiting in august!!! which means we can go to all of 'our' places together.

so... thats that.

hurrah groceries!

Mon, 02 Jun 2008 21:58:17 GMT

today was my first day of summer school. bio100.

my first day of school
-my partner was this boy named david who had dragons on his shirt. he also had a speech impediment, and i couldn't help but wonder, are kids with speech impediments doomed to be nerds?
-there was this kid in front of me whose butt crack was exposed through half of the 4.5 hour class.

18 more days of this...

on the bright side, i went grocery shopping with my mom and found two of my rare loves:

i fly like paper

Mon, 02 Jun 2008 03:13:05 GMT

sky harbor loves to claim that they are america's friendliest airport. it's not. i think salt lake city's airport is.

so since i made a list of creepy things about provo, i'm going to make a list of happy things about provo.

things about provo that make me happy
1. there is no shortage of ice cream/frozen yogurt places because everyone goes on too many dates, which may include ice cream. what is more wholesome than ice cream, after all?
2. if you walk down the street and make eye contact with someone, they will smile at you, and/or greet you.
3. no trashy slutalicious clothing here.
4. the little houses.
5. there is ALWAYS something to do. that doesn't involve binge drinking of fear of date rape.
6. everyone knows how to cook. dinner groups are amazing.
7. leave your $1000 laptop anywhere on campus. it's not going to get stolen.
8. matt's there.
9. i asked matt's neighbors if i could borrow a cup of sugar for my kool-aid.

theres more, but im getting bored.

you're a legend, dave

Tue, 27 May 2008 06:55:13 GMT

for everything to work out, you have to make it work out.

this is the part i have trouble with.

the past couple of days have been rainy. i stayed at cami's the past 2 nights. she let me use all her expensive hair products. we got free shave(d) ice today. i've read through the first 2 books in the twilight series (yeah, yeah... i got sucked in). tonight matt and i danced to feist while making french toast.

i wish i didn't have to leave him.

and so it is

Fri, 23 May 2008 08:09:48 GMT

things i wish i could do, but probably never will
be a yoga instructor
take yoga
own an art gallery or flower shoppe
know anything about art, or flowers
play a musical instrument, really well, preferrably the harp
get my doctorate (just for the dr.)
blow hundreds of dollars at anthropologie and/or urban
save money
be the lady on everday italian

good morning

Wed, 21 May 2008 17:30:14 GMT

i woke up to rain and sufjan stevens this morning. the view out of julianne's apartment is absolutely beautiful, you can see the tops of trees and mountains that are usually snow-capped. right now gray clouds are enveloping the mountain tops, and there is a slight breeze rustling the leaves. everything feels... pretty.

i want to scream at the top of my lungs

Tue, 20 May 2008 16:58:19 GMT

i am going to get my marketing degree at asu. and then i will go to fidm. if i don't go into fashion, or at least see if i like it, i will be settling for the rest of my life. i get so intimidated and down on myself on these types of things. i always think that i'd never be good enough, but thinking now, how on earth can i know that? i've never given my potential a chance. i need to just go for things. nothing is unattainable.

im really excited about this. i wish i were done with asu so i can move and start my life. 2 1/2 more years? ... yuck.

matt is probably going to get his mba after he graduates. he also wants to go to mba school in california or new york. apparently if you're going to get your mba, you may as well go to the best school. which means... long distance for another 2 years or someone has to compromise.

being in a serious relationship is funny. suddenly you're sharing your life, molding your life around them and vice versa. but i do love him. sometimes i look at him and i am surprised that he actually exists.

the friendship bread batter is still fermenting. smells like alcohol, and matt thinks its unsanitary. i refused to let him throw it away.

still in utah...

Mon, 19 May 2008 20:27:40 GMT

although i do love provo, i am ok with the fact that i don't live here. many things about this place creep me out.

things about provo that creep me out
1. people here like games a lot. board games, card games, sports games, you name it, they like it. too much.
2. the dating scene.
3. babies. strollers. everywhere.
4. bermuda shorts. now, i do own a pair of bermuda shorts, but i would like to think that i know how to rock them. the girls here... not so much. my sister bought me The Extra Half an Inch for my birthday, which is a guide to fashion by the one and only Victoria Beckham. best present ever, right? anyway, im pretty sure she would be against bermuda shorts, too. she's also against kitten heels.
5. at byu there's a duck pond in this very grassy area that is quite pretty in the daytime. however, there are signs that say "for your safety do not walk in this area after dark". if that isn't creepy enough, the words are in all caps in this drippy font that reminds me of a fake haunted house you would go to in your neighborhood in october.
6. matt and i were invited to go 'country dancing'. enough said.
7. nobody makes any less-than-wholesome jokes here. it seems like everyone likes the office, but nobody makes any TWSS jokes. peculiar. also, on saturday i was in a car with matt and his neighbors, and they were talking about a place called Tokerville in utah. TOKERVILLE. needless to say, i started cracking up. nobody else did. maybe they were used to it.

that's all for now. im sure i'll be able to add more in the next 12 days.

other than that, im still having fun here. im in some computer lab waiting for matt to get out of class. after that i'm going to continue re-reading harry potter and the deathly hallows. (yes!)

mount... timanogos? timpanagos?

Mon, 12 May 2008 20:55:36 GMT

things i learned my freshman year of college
- procrastination doesn't work.
- dorms are not the place to make friends. they are, however, the place to find high schoolers with no parental supervision.
- manzy is really as bad as they say it is.
- people are really, really annoying.

i think that's it.

im sitting at byu right now, waiting for matt to get out of class. i'm really excited to be here the next 3 weeks. i'm having so much fun! everyone here is so nice and the social life is awesome (and squeaky clean). i really wish i went here instead of yucky asu.

im staying with my friend julianne, my best friend from junior high! its crazy, it feels like nothing has changed between us. she made friendship bread last night, which is quite an interesting concept. let me explain. so theres this bag of batter that somebody has to give to you along with a copy of the recipe. you mush the bag for the next 10 days (not all the time of course, i think just now and then). you add more ingredients to it on the tenth day, use some of the batter, and split the rest up into 3 bags, and give those bags of batter to other people, and they do the same thing! like a chain letter, but way better, because friendship bread is delicioso!

it feels great to get to hang out with matt everyday. the best part is cooking with him. i love cooking meals with him. (actually, he pretty much does everything but the stirring. the stirring is my job.) so far we've made cookies, omlettes, and yakisoba! yaki means, to cook. on saturday he threw me a cookie party. a bunch of people came over to his apartment and brought cookies. it was scrumptious, to say the least. oh, we also went grocery shopping. that was fun, too. i felt like we were one of those young married couples that are all too common in provo. uh....

happy summer!

Mon, 05 May 2008 18:57:36 GMT

i totally got 98's on my communication and math finals. yep. that's me.

it's nice to be out of school. got up, put on a dress, and now i'm going out to the good egg with one of my favorite girls. I LOVE SUMMER!

so take it slow

Sun, 04 May 2008 18:51:04 GMT

i turned 19 today. at midnight i clipped my nails.

this is the most low-key birthday i've ever had. no crazy dance parties this year.

in my mind i always hope everything will be the same when old friends get together, but nothing ever is. people change, priorities change, friends change, ive changed. last night mel, kate, josh, and i went to get pizza muffins and skook. i just hoped that i could have the same fun i had junior year, but everything was different. i guess its just a part of growing up. i still feel close to them, but a different close. a close that means that we'll always be friends, but you're not going to be as involved in my life anymore. which is inevitable, i guess.

the semester is over, thank the heavens. i think i did ok. im in the process of moving out at manzy. it feels good.

blogspot was annoying. so im back to livejournal.

Wed, 30 Apr 2008 07:22:42 GMT

im finishing up the most stressful semester of my life. high school was nothing compared to college. i miss senior year, when i went to school for 4 hours and went out every single night. now i go to school and then study for the rest of the day. and im still getting a c in accounting. me. a c. humiliating. so im trying to take it easy next semester, i think my dream of graduating in 3 years is unattainable. unless i want to kill myself doing schoolwork all the time like this semester. which i dont. so thats that.

matt was here this past week, and i was sick for most of it. (i keep getting embarassing sicknesses this year...) at least he sat and watched tv with me and brought me smoothies. his sister jenell invited me over for her birthday dinner and it was DELICIOUS. before i got sick we went to a My Feral Kin show. i haven't been to one of julio's shows in a year, and it was great see him again. we also went over to his brother's house and his wife lauren made us these AMAZING grilled cheese sandwiches. their baby, warner, crawled behind me on the couch and played hide and seek with me. it really made me happy because i always feel like an idiot trying to play with him because he doesn't respond most of the time... cough. it's not his fault, i mean i just don't know what to do with babies... yeah.

my diet today has consisted of hungry howie's pizza (with garlic crust mmmmmmmmmm), panda express, and banana cream pie. all of which i still have leftovers for tomorrow. brad brought over pie for me and elyssa, it was very sweet of him. now im sitting here wishing it were christmas again. oh and its my birthday on sunday. i'll be 19. sounds better than 18. i hope i get a lot of cash so i can buy desperately needed summer clothes. thats all.

Sun, 20 Apr 2008 00:44:39 GMT

my hair looks like a black person's today. and i think im going to get a blogspot, i think thats the cooler thing these days.

Thu, 17 Apr 2008 01:22:46 GMT

you disgust me.

Sun, 13 Apr 2008 18:22:28 GMT

i hate the relationship i have with my parents. it bothers me when people tell me to try and change it. it's not that easy.

i have always been the perfect daughter with the perfect grades. i always made them proud. but now that i'm "changing," and i "don't listen to them anymore" (aka growing up, making decisions that i'm capable of making without them, becoming an adult for goodness sakes) they don't know how to handle it. they find ways to hurt me and guilt me and treat me like a child, and i'm so sick of it.

nothing is ever resolved in my house, everything is avoided, and i think thats why i am the way i am. my sister texted me and said that she thinks they're the reason why she's f'ed up. and i think i understand.

it always amazes me that the people who are supposed to be the closest are the most distant, and how the most distant are the ones who could make me feel pain like none other.

Sat, 29 Mar 2008 04:54:07 GMT

bah. my grades this semester suck. and its not even because i havent been studying. thats all i do.

i hate college.

baha

Fri, 21 Mar 2008 03:15:39 GMT

yesterday my doctor commended me on being a v, and then i had to get a butt shot.

so...

Mon, 03 Mar 2008 20:33:44 GMT

im sitting in noble library trying to figure out my fall semester. i need to declare a major. i think im just going to jump into marketing and hope i like it. because i am not wasting any time switching majors.

i hope its right.... eh.

im also contemplating a design studies minor. that is, if it doesnt keep me from graduating in 2010.

im crazy.

then sings my soul

Mon, 03 Mar 2008 06:05:16 GMT

i haven't felt this good in a long time. i should keep it this way.

so one of my friends who has never had any sort of relationship is getting to know this guy. he's really sweet to her. she calls me after they hang out and tells me what wonderful feeling it is, to have someone that she can talk to and be herself like that. she is giddy, and it reminds me of when i met matt. i still feel that today.

i started figuring out my summer schedule. looks like i'm going to be taking 2 geology classes and a math class, plus a music history class online. hm. that means at least 4 hours a day at school mon-thurs. classes at 8am. sounds sucky, but my summer classes plus my winter intercession class equals a whole semester tucked under my belt. which means i'll be able to graduate at least a semester early, if i don't decide to take classes next summer. so i'm kind of excited for that. i'm also looking for maybe a weekend summer job. i might go back to urban. oh ps, i'm quitting urban. i'll miss my discount. i think i want to learn how to play some songs on the piano too. and bake. i need to keep myself busy. i say that but i'll probably end up wanting to sleep all day.

the fall semester looks like a doozy. i don't want to drive to school mon-fri. i hate driving. but i also hate living in tempe. and i cant find a decent apartment that is walking distance to the business college. if anybody has suggestions, give me a holler.

starry, starry night

Sun, 24 Feb 2008 08:25:26 GMT

i really want to drop out of college and through luck end up in a career i really like. dare to dream.

tonight i went to randee's birthday dinner with mel and kate. it felt really good to be out of the house/dorm on the weekend. i really miss being with friends. i feel like when im stuck at asu im always around people i dont really like. i mean i love my roomate and suitemates, but once it gets past a certain level, i find it hard to connect to them. i also find it hard to connect to their friends, who i find myself around all too often. this girl claire that elyssa is friends with disagreed with me that most local bands suck.

i mean, come on.

needless to say, going home was such a breath of fresh air. i think its easy to tell that my tolerance level is not up to par. i just, need to be around people that don't feel the need to say the f-word all the time. and i mean, ALL THE TIME.

i just thought college would be this great experience where i would meet lots of cool people and have this great adventure with my cool new friends. but i guess manzanita was the wrong place for me to be. never again.

on top of other things,i have a bladder infection, and its been giving me chills and light headedness and other bad stuff that would probably be tmi. i've been freaking out. luckily im taking antibiotics and it's kind of fun.

in less than 2 weeks i get to see matt for a whole week! im so excited. long distance relationships are just as hard as i thought. i guess i'm going to be keeping this up for the next year and a half. unless i fall in love with byu when i go up there and decide to accept my admittance. (highly unlikely but i'm not ruling it out) or he comes back down to arizona. but we've got a lot going on for us where we are so this might be what we have to do. hm.

hm...

Fri, 01 Feb 2008 03:15:19 GMT

i secretly think accounting is fun.

what happened?

Mon, 21 Jan 2008 20:50:27 GMT

people used to "love my energy".

wah

Fri, 04 Jan 2008 04:32:49 GMT

my lover officially resides in utah :[

Thu, 27 Dec 2007 19:29:58 GMT

im afraid for us.